Creating a holiday parenting time schedule can make the season less stressful and more joyful for co-parents and children alike. The holidays should be a time filled with family traditions, celebrations, and memories but when you’re co-parenting after a separation or divorce, it can also bring added stress as you try to balance everyone’s expectations.
In Ontario, family law encourages parents to create a holiday parenting time schedule that puts the children’s best interests first. A well-thought-out plan can help everyone enjoy the holidays peacefully, giving children the chance to spend meaningful time with both parents.
What a Holiday Parenting Time Schedule Covers
A holiday parenting time schedule sets out how children will spend special days like Christmas, Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, New Year’s, and birthdays. These plans usually take priority over the regular parenting schedule so that each parent has time to observe their traditions with the children.
Most separation agreements or court orders include a detailed holiday schedule. It often sets out specific dates and times, who handles drop-offs and pick-ups, and how certain family traditions will be honoured. Having this clarity helps prevent confusion and reduces the chance of conflict.
And while many parents prefer to stick to their original agreement, there’s always room for flexibility. If both parents agree, they can adjust the schedule as needed especially when something special comes up.
Why It Makes Sense to Plan Ahead for Holidays
Planning your holiday parenting time schedule early makes a world of difference. Many separation agreements include deadlines—such as finalizing holiday plans by December 1—to give everyone time to prepare. If you don’t already have a written plan, it’s best to start discussing one as soon as possible, ideally with the help of a family law lawyer or mediator if needed.
When parents wait until the last minute, it can lead to misunderstandings or even the need for court involvement, which can take months to resolve. Starting early keeps things calm and ensures the children know what to expect during the holidays.
Keep the Focus on the Children in Your Holiday Parenting Time Schedule
At the heart of every parenting time plan is one simple principle, what’s best for the children. The law in Ontario puts their needs first, and so should you. Think about their emotional well-being, routines, and the traditions they look forward to. Courts also consider the children’s relationships with each parent and, for older children, their personal preferences.
Kids benefit when they can enjoy meaningful time with both parents during the holidays. Even if that means sharing time differently than you would like, it’s worth remembering that a positive holiday experience can create lasting memories for them.
Making the Holiday Plan Specific
The more detailed your holiday plan is, the smoother things will go. Specify the exact times children will move between homes—such as noon on Christmas Day—and clearly define how holidays like Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Christmas Eve, and Christmas Day will be shared.
If travel is part of the plan, decide how far in advance it should be discussed and whether written consent will be required for trips. Parents can even agree on how to resolve any disagreements that come up, such as using a parenting coordinator or alternating who gets to choose first in certain years.
Different Ways to Share the Holidays
Every family is different, and so are the ways they choose to divide their holiday parenting time schedule. Some parents take turns each year, alternating holidays so that one has the children for Christmas, Kwanzaa or Hanukkah one year and the other the next. Others prefer to split the days evenly between two households.
If your families have different traditions — say one celebrates Christmas while the other observes Hanukkah — you can create a schedule that respects both. In situations where parents live far apart, alternating entire holiday periods, such as the full winter break, can make travel easier and less disruptive for the kids.
What to Do When Parents Can’t Agree
Even with the best intentions, some parents struggle to agree on a holiday parenting time schedule. When that happens, there are options beyond heading straight to court. Mediation, arbitration, or working with a parenting coordinator can often help parents reach common ground without the stress of litigation.
If those methods don’t work—or aren’t appropriate in cases involving safety concerns—the court can step in to make a decision. Judges will always base their ruling on what’s best for the children, considering factors like past arrangements, each parent’s cooperation, and the children’s preferences.
Handling Travel and Distance
Travel adds another layer of complexity, especially if one parent lives in another city or province. To keep things running smoothly, travel plans should be made well in advance. The travelling parent may also need a signed consent letter from the other parent if taking the children outside Canada, and sometimes even for longer domestic trips.
When parents live far apart, alternating full holiday periods or combining travel with parenting time can make the most sense. It helps minimize back-and-forth transitions and allows the children to settle in and enjoy the season.
Working With a Family Lawyer Can Make Setting Up a Holiday Parenting Time Schedule Smoother
A clear, fair holiday parenting time schedule helps children enjoy the best of both worlds while giving parents peace of mind. Whether you’re drafting one for the first time or adjusting an existing plan, it’s wise to get professional advice.
At Scharff Nyland Chambers LLP, our experienced family law lawyers can help you create a holiday parenting time schedule that works for everyone while keeping your children’s needs at the centre. We offer support through our offices in Barrie, Toronto, Wasaga Beach, and Collingwood. Call 1-866-721-5851, email reception@sncfamilylaw.com, or visit our website to book a consultation and get the legal guidance you need this holiday season.
***The information provided in this blog is for general informational purposes only and should not be construed as legal advice. If you have legal questions, we strongly advise you to contact us.
